Let’s get one thing straight: we don’t give a fuck about each other. Strangers we pass every day, people we see in the street, hell, even most of the people we work with—we don’t care if they live or die. And before you get all self-righteous on me, let’s just be honest. The truth is, we don’t have the capacity to care about 7 billion people. Thousands die every day, and we keep moving. We don’t shed a tear. We don’t give it a second thought. It’s not personal—it’s just how it is.
And yet, here’s the insane part: we care deeply about what these same people think of us. These people who we wouldn’t notice if they disappeared tomorrow have power over us. We bend, shape, and contort ourselves just to avoid their judgment. We silence our true selves, repress what we really want to say, and act like someone we’re not, just to avoid the possibility that someone—anyone—might not approve of us. What the fuck is that?
It’s gotta stop. It’s beyond fucked up. It’s toxic. It’s stupid. It’s a waste of energy, time, and most of all, it’s a betrayal of who we are. Why should we give a damn about what someone who doesn’t give a damn about us thinks? This entire charade we play—the one where we’re constantly seeking approval from people who would walk by our funeral without a second glance—is a joke.
Why should we give a damn about what someone who doesn’t give a damn about us thinks?
We spend our lives terrified of being judged, of not being liked, of being cast out from a group that doesn’t actually give a damn about us in the first place. Why do we fear rejection from people who mean nothing to us? Why do we let strangers’ opinions matter more than our own?
It’s all fear. Deep down, we’re still wired like we’re part of some ancient tribe where acceptance meant survival. We fear their judgment more than we fear losing our true selves. It’s a sick game, and the only way to win is to stop playing. It’s time to call it out for what it is: an illusion.
And here is the mind-bending paradox: The more we care about their approval, the more we repress our true selves, the less we can actually care about others. When you’re constantly tiptoeing around trying to be liked, you’re not present. You’re not available to truly care about people because you’re too damn wrapped up in how you’re being perceived. Every smile, every word is calculated—nothing real, nothing authentic. How can you actually care for someone when you’re too busy pretending?
The more we’re obsessed with being accepted, the less we’re capable of giving a shit about anyone else. That kind of care—the real, deep, raw care—comes from being unapologetically yourself. It comes from dropping the masks and living without fear of rejection. Only then can you be present enough to actually give a damn about the people around you.
If you really want to learn to care about people, you’ve got to stop caring what they think about you. That’s the paradox. The more you’re obsessed with how others see you, the less you’re capable of truly seeing them. If you’re constantly filtering your words and actions through the lens of “Will they like me?” you’re not present with them. You’re not really connecting with them. You’re performing.
That’s the paradox. The more you’re obsessed with how others see you, the less you’re capable of truly seeing them.
But when you stop caring what they think—when you stop giving a fuck about their approval—you’re free. Free to show up as your real self. Free to connect without any agenda, without the need to be liked. And that’s when you can actually start to care about them—not for their approval, but because you’re finally present enough to see them as they are, and care for them in an authentic way.
Living free means owning who you are without apology, without explanation, and without giving a single fuck about anyone else’s opinion. It means being willing to be disliked, judged, and even hated if it means staying true to yourself. It means respecting people enough to let them form their own opinions about you—and respecting yourself enough to not give a damn about what those opinions are.
We don’t need approval. We don’t need validation. What we need is to stop hiding, stop repressing, stop acting like we owe it to anyone to make them feel comfortable with who we are.
You want freedom? You want self-respect? Then stop living for their approval. They don’t care about you. They don’t give a fuck. So why should you?
And the more you let that go, the more you’ll find that you actually do care—but not in a fearful, desperate way. You’ll care because you’re real, because you’re not burning all your energy trying to protect a version of yourself that doesn’t even exist.
When you stop caring about what they think, you’ll find the freedom to truly care.